So Dad and I went out for Chinese tonight for some father-son bonding. Here're some of the gems of intellect that was said over chicken wings:

Me: So what's your fortune say, Da?
Dad: Egg.
Me: Egg?
Dad: Egg.
Me: Turn the paper around, Dad.
- Dad, upon reading the "Learn Chinese" bit on the back of the fortune.

Dad: ....and so the judge told Shylock that while he could have his one pound of flesh, he could only take it without spilling even a single drop of blood. And Shylock, who hated the guy, was all "Son of a bitch!" only because it was in Shakespearean, he really said "Son of thy bitch!"
- Explaining "The Merchant of Venice" in his own particular way.

So I think Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs is narrating the new Ghost Hunters episodes.

My world is complete.

It's probably some sort of cheat code using noclip, but..... maybe the cake isn't actually a lie.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5QveX3-1O8&feature=related

"Too Little Too Late"
-Barenaked Ladies

You say, "Why does everything revolve around you?"
You say, "Why does everything I do confound you?"
You say that I pulled the world from under you,
You can't go through it this time

And I could be good , and I would - If I knew I was understood
And it'll be great , just wait - Or is it too little too late?

One day, this embarrassment will fade behind me
And that day I could think of things that won't remind me
But these days it's unbearable for both of us
We can't discuss it this way (this way)

I'm gaining strength, trying to learn to pull my own weight
But I'm gaining pounds at the precipice of Too Late
Just Wait

I could be good, and I would - If I knew I was understood
And it'll be great, just wait - Or is it too little too late?

Record and play, after years of endless rewind
Yesterday wasn't half as tough as this time
This time isn't Hell,
Last time, I couldn't tell
This mind wasn't well
Next time, hope I'm...
Going to be good, and I would -
If I knew I was understood
And it'll be great, just wait -
Or is it too little too late?
Good, and I would -
If I thought I was understood
And it'll be great, just wait -
or is it too little too late

New journal! Insert filler post here.